1. Let me start by stating that my religion, my beliefs, my lifestyle, and the consequent oppression that I experience in the West is, not, a social experiment to try out for a few days. I’ve been wearing the Hijab for over a decade, and the physical and verbal violence I’ve experienced because of it cannot be replicated in your little 3 week game: after you decide you’ve learned enough and take off the Hijab, you go back to being the most privileged person in society–a white Christian person, while my experiences continue to haunt me in every new social setting, airport, etc that I go to. You know the few xenophobic remarks you heard weren’t directed toward you, but the religion you were playing pretend and representing. You know if things get tense you can just say “oh it’s all an experiment!” and take it off and everything will be okay. For you, it’s just a game, but for hundreds of Muslim women who used to wear the Hijab everyday now are being forced to choose between faith and personal safety in this amplified anti-Muslim climate.
Our experiences and oppression cannot be draped over your head.
2. In case I haven’t already stressed this enough, you’re sort of really white. Meaning, you don’t look Middle-Eastern. Or Black. By this fact alone, you already experience a privileged interaction with your environment. Being Black in the USA is obviously not the same as being white in the USA. The same goes for when you’ve added a headscarf to that unbalanced equation. And as most Muslims in the USA are not white, no matter how tightly you wrap your headscarf, you won’t be able to replicate the experiences of most Muslims in the USA (p.s. don’t get any ideas–no blackface).
I do have distinctly Middle Eastern features, but I acknowledge I’m light-skinned myself, and therefore can’t speak for those who do have darker skin than I do and are visibly Muslim. So I’ll share the writing of Margari Hill, a Black Muslim American who has written an amazing article, here. (See what I just did? White allies take note).
3. You mentioned that you work at a coffee shop and that your coworkers:
“…knew I did not wear hijab before, and that I am a Christian, so they were confused” and “asked very politely, in some variation of the following: “What are you wearing?”…I explained my experiment and they were immediately very accepting.”
You wrote that this positive reaction is probably because of the “very progressive” area of the USA you live in. While that definitely doesn’t hurt, it’s clearly a little more than that: your community already knows you as a non-Muslim. In fact, you might not have even gotten the coffee shop job in the first place if you interviewed as Muslim. I can’t tell you how many times I was turned down for a job because they were “no longer accepting applicants” despite the “hiring” sign still in the window or my white Christian friend being encouraged to apply just a few days later. You already have the love and support of your friends and co-workers because they just see you as a white, Christian girl who is just playing an “experiment”–did you even care to try to tell people about why you were wearing a headscarf or the meaning behind it rather than just gleefully exploiting it as a symbol of your supposed good-natured, tolerance, and acceptance of Muslim people?
I get what you’re trying to do, and your intentions may have been good and well (although they’re hard to hear over what seems to be screaming white savior complex). But if you need to wear a headscarf to be able to be an ally to the Muslim community, that’s deeply problematic. I don’t need to “experience” being black or trans to stand in solidarity and support those communities.
Rather than trying so hard to veil your privilege (bad pun intended), use it to be a good ally: talk to other stubborn non-Muslim people in your community and in your circles. You could go through the trouble of wrapping a scarf around your head but you couldn’t actually respond to a racist lady who called Muslims terrorists. To quote you, in your interaction with her:
“The woman walked away as I did because I was extremely uncomfortable.”
Poor you.
You /literally\ had one job.
I’ve been physically and verbally assaulted on multiple occasions, had my Hijab pulled off, and have been (and will continue to be) pulled off for “random” security checks every time I fly while other passengers exchange uncomfortable and nervous glances as I speak to my parents in Farsi, telling them I miss them already.
I don’t wish my experience to be replicated. I just want you to listen to, and share and support my voice as a Muslim-Iranian Hijabi woman living in the USA. Use your privilege to uplift and support Muslim voices and Muslim experiences, not talk over us and be hailed for your bravery.
So to Amber Rene and other non-Muslims “wearing a Hijab for a day” as a game, no matter how many times you wrap your headscarf, you still won’t “experience” my life. It’s only covering your ears from hearing our voices.
P.S. Thank you to my friend Nur Banu for being a fabulous Muslim woman, bringing Amber Rene’s post to my attention, and inspiring this post. xx
Edit: This post does not intend to, in any way, say that white people can’t be Muslim (that would be absolutely false and ridiculous for me to say), but that I do not support a very specific case: non-Muslims wearing a Hijab for a day as a social experiment and using their voices to cover Muslim voices, thinking that a day in Hijab is an accurate way to experience being Muslim in the USA or that you need to even experience being Muslim in order to stand in solidarity with Muslims.
Related: Notes From a Muslim Feminist
