Of course, here I don’t want to talk about self-care that has been turned into an excuse to get out of just about everything, ultimately adding more work for everyone else you’re working with (and therefore disrupting their ability to “self-care” as well), but a redefinition of our relationships to productivity and how we can avoid this type of “burn-out” self care altogether, as learned while in Iran.
Think of this as a preventative self-care method to help prevent burn-out, rather than a list of ways to take care of yourself and enjoy cute things after you’ve already over-worked yourself (because let’s be real–my list includes looking at cute baby bird photos and I’ve been told many times, wildly enough, that not everyone finds comfort in doing so).
The concept of individual “self-care” is a learned act, foreign to many AMEMSA (African, Middle Eastern, Muslim, South Asian) people as continual self-sacrifice for a family or community is deeply inherent to collectivist communities of the “East” (as opposed to the Western model of individualism). It doesn’t matter that you are sick and have two exams tomorrow — if your friend is also sick you’re bringing them homemade soup, pronto. But this mindset of serving others before looking after yourself does not play out in isolation: it is part of a larger culture and lifestyle that has a particular definition of productivity, idea of relationships, and outlook of time (why do you think we are always late!!) that sits almost directly contrary to Western, capitalist-infused culture.
Here in Chicago (okay well now technically I’m in a cafe in New Jersey where I just finished getting in an argument with a Trump supporter who was defending the Muslim Ban. I’m on my Tehran Streetstyle book tour so if you’re in NYC peep my upcoming events to see where you can catch me!) we correlate happiness to productivity, and productivity to checking concrete things off our to-do lists–things that are usually chores or related to work or organizing (replying to client emails, meetings, etc). And more often than not, we tend to drop those activities and rituals first that are deeply grounding and healing: praying, playing music, reading, writing poetry…sleeping, as they don’t make it on our list of to-dos: they are “saved” for our non-existent free-time.
But, one of the most important things I’ve learned from my time in Iran and the Middle East & North Africa is redefining my relationship to productivity: being productive more than just in a capitalistic, individual economic sense, but being productive for myself, my relationships, and my community too.
